Saburday Noon Musings

One of the more interesting things about my job is meeting people with fascinating life stories. We were allowed an interview with one of the more reclusive bigwig types of the high and mighty and I was truly astounded for the opportunity.

There she was, an old lady turning 86 who has accomplished so many things and yet still has so much to live for. She still goes to the office to check on everything, walks in heels and finds it uncomfortable to parade in flats. She talks animatedly, with a sparkle in her eyes recalling all the wonderful moments of her life.

I look at her and listen to her stories intently and wonder how can she still be so full of life at her age while I am slowly dying away at mine.

All Friday was spent at work taping here, flying all the way down south for another event, and furnishing editing requirements until 4am. My first meal was at midnight, a measly burger and fries inside a cab because I had to rush back to the office from the event. If it isn't bad enough, the dubbing materials were awful, I didn't have an editing bay to use, the computer wouldn't save my files, my usb was missing, and my eyes were dropping involuntarily.

As if nothing is going right in my life, I tried to patiently breathe it all in and let God teach me a lesson. Then on my morning devotion (which hasn't been so much of a devotion lately) I read about how children of God minister to others without their intending to or as a side-result of what they're really up to.

Then I was asked, 'why do I do what I do? Whose life am I affecting?'

I considered my producers who depended on me to make sure all the aspects in their stories were covered. I thought about our hosts who had to read the researches we submitted so they, too can respond to it. I remembered the news security personnel who continuously asked me to go home already and rest. Then I looked back on the old lady with so much life and regarded how she loved God so much that whatever she did would be for His glory.

Are the things I am doing or the quality of my work worthy of a great God from Whom my talents came? I just tear up evaluating the answer and know that I fall short every single time. Yet God remains faithful and continues to affirm that I am where I am because He put me there. I just hope and pray that when people see me, they see the Master I serve.

Blogging Hiatus Ends Here (?)

I've been meaning to compose a wise, too-brilliant-for-words blog about the things that run in my head (and gosh, the speed they run is quite remarkable) but I'm usually, nay, always reduced to a 140-character limit much thanks to twitter.

For fear that this might yet again turn into a bullet-ed entry, I'm going to try to keep up with the prose in my head. Expect it to lack coherence, proper punctuation, and correct paragraph(ical?) breaks.

Summer's always a good time to sit back and relax and I think perhaps even when summers past have proven to be life-draining (what with being in the Pilipinas work force in the last four years), it still has the right elements for a good muni-muni.

I've resigned to the death of a million (and counting) brain cells in my, well, brain. It is true that I'm getting bobo-er by the minute and thus, I resolve to want to learn something new. To get a new hobby-- hobbies, which do not include sweating, unnecessary contact with mortals, and getting rid of my newfound xainess.

I seem to lose interest in all the things I used to be good at. I feel like an old geezer looking back on glory days when life was much more pleasant and when everything is cause for a celebration. Ask me any day, happy or not, and I'd tell you I want the world to end.

Life on earth is getting pretty old. I'm evaluating what I'm still doing here when I know I'm such a waste of oxygen. Then again, my life isn't about me anymore so I guess God can just call the shots. I only pray that I stop haggling and pestering Him to end it. I need prayers on that aspect. I don't want to be alive and feel dead. But really, I do think the signs of the times are at hand.

I'm thankful that God spares me from a lot of things I'd never imagine getting into. Like break ups. I never want to break up with anyone. I always say that I will get it right the first time. I think the resolution works for me because then I will not hastily jump into something I am not prepared for. They say one can never tell but I say I can start right. Watching all the dramas my friends get into is enough warning that I cannot handle what they're going through right now. I'm thinking Popoy and Basha and I go, no, I cannot live through that, not with my psycho tendencies and drama queen complex.

Thank you, Star Cinema, for immortalizing the issues couples experience.

My baguio friends are in Corregidor and Bataan to celebrate heroes I suppose or enjoy summer. My church buddies were in Tagaytay for a family day, which half of my family attended. My college best friends were in my house so we can catch up with each other and I think having been Manila-bound was actually good for me.

I'm off to Cebu in a while. I had better get a move on. Toodles!